He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not…

April 7, 2011

I don’t understand why and I tell him that all of the time but for some reason Benjamin loves me. Perhaps it’s from growing up with sisters but I always want everything to be even. I’d like for us to both spend the same amount on Christmas presents, if he buys dinner then I want to buy dinner next time, and if we go to an event and he buys the tickets then I at least want to pay for the parking.

But he doesn’t let me and while it makes me feel special and I love that he does it, it’s not even. He tells me it’s his job and he wants to because he loves me but in the back of my head I’m thinking but what do I even have to offer him?

Ok I promise this isn’t supposed to be a debbie-downer post, but instead a look-how-cute-and-awesome-my-boyfriend-is post, so here’s my little story 🙂 First you should know that I live in Pittsburgh and Benjamin live in NYC, so we see each other about once a month (which is so not enough). Therefore, when we do see each other on the one weekend a month we’re pretty much inseparable (No worries Momma we’re separable at night :0) ). However, and it’s beginning to become a running joke with my family, I tend to fall asleep on Ben a lot.  Like when we’re watching TV or in the car or like this past Friday. Benjamin flew me to New York and we had an awesome Saturday shopping and visiting Brooklyn’s Botanical Garden (I’ll be posting those pictures too!), then he took me to dinner for our “date night” at this little place and we had a wonderful meal and rented a movie.  We got back to his apartment around 9:30 and I got a headache. I get these headaches a good amount and when they hit they’re not a sharp pain or a migraine, but just a slow throbbing that makes me so sleepy. So I get in my hot pink, plaid pj’s pants with a over-sized t-shirt (I look totally hot) and Ben asks me to get my taxes so he can finish them and then what do I do? I pass out! He tried to wake me up to get ready for bed and I refused. So much for a date night.

I woke up in the morning to find that he had finished my taxes and paper clipped and stapled so that I couldn’t mess anything up (because compared to him I’m unorganized and not very responsible). He got my computer and charged it because I had said I would do it and didn’t and then he plugged in my phone to charge. There is no way I can compare to all that he does for me and I still don’t know why he loves me and what he sees in me, but I’ll try and stop trying to make everything even and take this thoughtful, caring and loving guy :0)

…He so loves me :0)

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